I was having a conversation with my mother and she divulged some information to me. I immediately got upset because I felt like someone was taking advantage of my mother. If you know me, I’m my mother’s keeper.
As my mother is telling me this story, I’m questioning her and asking her, how she could allow this to happen, she needed to put her foot down and say something. If you know my mom, she hates conflict, she rarely even raises her voice. Now she’s trying to deflect the conversation and get me to talk about something else. I keep coming back, because I want her to realize that something has to change.
She stops me mid-conversation and tells me “is this what you called me for?” I got in my feelings, and I said forget it, I’ll talk to you later and hung up.
At this time, I’m still upset, because I know my mom. She will not say anything just to stay away from conflict and the situation will continue on. In efforts to help my mom, I call my dad. I tell him the situation and ask him to step in and help. He proceeds to tell me that it doesn’t bother my mother, she was the one who initiated it, and that she didn’t mind, and that she actually rather do it that particular way.
As soon as my father said that, I realized that I was getting upset and offended on my mother’s behalf all because I thought someone was taking advantage of her.
This made me think, how many times do we get offended on behalf of someone else. It isn’t our problem, but we step in, get offended, and hurt on someone else’s behalf. They’re at peace with the situation, because they look at it through a different lens.
It’s all about perspective. Even though I may be right about this person taking advantage of my mother, it still doesn’t matter. Ultimately, if my mother is fine with the situation, and it isn’t bothering her, who am I to say, what she is doing is wrong? I got myself worked up for no reason because she didn’t feel like I felt.
Later on that evening, I call my mom to apologize, and she answers the phone like nothing ever happened, like we didn’t just have a brief argument. Her actions, made me think of what a mother’s love looks like. She didn’t care that we had gotten into an argument hours prior, she cared that her daughter was calling her to talk to her. She didn’t remind me of my faults, she just moved on with grace.
It made me think of God’s love for us. My mother’s actions made me feel in reality God’s love for us and how He doesn’t remind us of our faults, but He operates with love and mercy. Deep down in my soul, my heart was at peace to feel such a sweet experience.
So, when you’re fighting on someone else’s behalf make sure they feel the same way. If they don’t, you’re wasting your time, your emotions, and energy. It’s all about perspective.
Don’t get offended on someone else’s behalf if they’re not in agreement with you. When you do this you’re stealing your own joy and happiness. If you feel some type of way about it, just pray about it!